I really enjoy cooking, but shopping...

...ehhhh, not so much.

As I type this, my hands smell of cinnamon, sage, marjoram, pepper, mustard and fennel, with a hint of sweetness to it from the sugar in the mix. I just rubbed down the ham that tomorrow will spend two and a hours on the rotisserie grill out back and then be thrice drenched in a Southern Comfort and molasses mop over the course of another half hour.

And I'm about to go make Lola's stuffing. Lola was my great grandmother. I guess she's still my great grandmother, she just isn't living any more. She died when I was an infant or toddler. But while she was alive, I'm told, she never let me cry. And she spoke only Castilian Spanish, though she understood a great deal more English than she let on. Because my Dad and Mom decided to wait to have children, Lola called my Dad "pendejo" and "mediohombre," implying that he was incapable of knocking up the Moms.

Anyway - Lola's stuffing is without question, the best stuffing in the known Universe. Here's the recipe:

½ - ¾ lb ground veal
½ - ¾ lb ground pork
1 green apple
1 or 2 chopped onion
3 stalks celery chopped
1 or 2 cloves of garlic
¼ cup parsley chopped
2 eggs
1-3 cups of croutons
½ cup raisins (soaked in hot water, drained)
½ cup of butter

Brown onions, celery, garlic, and parsley in 1 cube of butter (5 min)

Add meat, apple, croutons raisins, salt, and pepper. Cook until done.

Remove from heat. Add eggs slightly beaten. If stuffing is runny, add more croutons or breadcrumbs.

Prepare the night before and let sit in refrigerator overnight.

I know there's some vagueness in this recipe - like a 50% swing in the amount of meat. I like a little more meat and a few more raisins. But mess around a bit. Add stuff until it smells right. And this year, I could not find ground veal. Normally, I would never buy veal anyway, but it's a family tradition. But this year I could not find any at three different grocery stores. So I think I'm going to sub a bit of ground beef and a bit of ground turkey. The point is for it to have beef flavor and be a bit moist. I hope it works.

Which leads me to the "shopping, ehhh, not so much part." I did most of the shopping last week. But as we finalized our menu for the day, there were a few things to pick up. OK, more than a few things. And shopping where I live in general is among the most depressing things I ever have to do on a normal day. But it is even worse on the day before Thanksgiving.

I overheard an argument that almost turned violent over the difference between sweet potatoes and yams and which ones they should buy. And then there were strong opinions over whether to get the brand name jet puffed marshmallows or the off-brand mini-marshmallows.

Parolee in a wife beater: "You get twice as much with the mini ones."

Wife (perhaps wife, unsure about beaten, but moderately bruised): "Yeah, but we don't need twice as much unless we get more yams."

Parolee: "We're getting sweet potatoes."

There were countless inconsiderate people leaving their carts in the worst places - like right in front of the spice rack, or the middle of the aisle, or in front of the dairy door. And there was one woman whose ass, I kid you not, was wider than her cart and had three bratty kids pulling things off the shelves on both sides of the aisle. I took a detour down the panty hose ailse to get away from that scene. And I only saw one minor spanking today, so that was better than usual.

One year when I was just out of college, I saw an old man buying a Swanson turkey dinner and some wine. That made me cry in the car after I unloaded my groceries. If I ever see that again, I'm inviting the person over.

Someday I'll write about a typical trip to Wal-Mart and registering people to vote.

That's it for now. I have to go make the stuffing and bake chocolate chip pumpkin bread and clean the oven and get the rotisserie set up on the grill (I hope I have enough propane, now that I think about it) and wash the dogs and take a shower and move the tables and I think that's it.

Happy Thanksgiving.