Wow. John Edwards. Wow.

Years ago I wrote in my journal that I have no living heroes - because as long as they are alive, they might let you down someday.

We dodged a bullet. Good lord, if I had gotten my way and he had won the nomination, and this stuff came out now? It would be 4 more years of Bush-like rule. Even though McCain did the same sort of thing, and probably worse, he surely would win.

There's a part of me that feels really duped - like I was really behind this guy because he was the first to talk about and the most outspoken about curbing corporate power as a means to restoring our ravaged democratic system.

And a small part of me that I don't like want to know all of the details. Like is it his kid? Is she the only one? But the better part of me doesn't care. He got caught cheating and lied about it and I'm sorry, I just can't vote for you. And with your fine hair, I'm sure you can do just fine selling cars or or doing the weather for your local NBC affiliate.

Then there's a part of me that goes, "Ah, so that's why he dropped out so early." I couldn't understand it at the time. He came in second in Iowa, and I was really hoping for an Edwards/Obama ticket.

And then I was really hoping for an Obama/Edwards ticket.

And now...

I just don't know any more. Gore? Kucinic?

And then there's the part of me that worries that something like this might be out there for Obama as well. If I was wrong about Edwards, you know, I might be wrong about Obama, too.

At least I know I'm right about McCain.